NeedMe Read online

  Which brought her full circle to a ménage. Cale was hot. Undoubtedly. His frequent bed partners proved he had more going on than good looks as well. Despite his often irreverent sense of humor, Cale was as serious as Tony was carefree. He also happened to be a bit fickle. Though she couldn’t quibble about a man’s choices when she already had one guy and was angling how to get two.

  “Marsh? You alive over there?”

  Did she dare? She didn’t want to drive her lover away, even in the name of research.

  Forget research. She was horny and Cale was delicious. And charming. And so very male that just one look in his ice-blue eyes was usually enough to wet her panties.

  She cleared her throat to fill the silence. “I’ve decided to write a book,” she said rather than what weighed heaviest on her mind.

  “You? No frigging way.”

  Marcia made a face, so annoyed she didn’t even care about the wrinkles probably multiplying on her forehead. “Why is it so surprising? I helped run a bookstore.”

  “Yeah, but you don’t read.”

  “That’s completely false. I read now and then.”

  “What kind of book?”

  She nibbled her lip to keep her smile from spreading. Oh, he’d love this. “An advice manual for women. On reclaiming their sexuality, and all the ways to do it.” She made sure to add extra emphasis to all the ways.

  Instead of laughing or congratulating her, he grew quiet. “Why that subject?”

  “Because it’s an important one. Too many women don’t ask for what they need in bed. Rather than let the men call all the shots, it’s time women talk about what gives them pleasure.”

  “And you’re an expert on that.”

  “Well, not an expert, but I think since I ditched the ex who shall not be named, I’ve been pretty assertive in stating what I’m looking for in the bedroom.” Most of the time. “I haven’t heard you complain yet.”

  “Are you sure you’re not writing it to make up for what you’re missing?”

  “Huh? What?” Her pen rolled across the table and fell off the edge. “I’m not missing anything.”

  Hadn’t she just been thinking about sleeping with Cale? But not alone. She wanted Tony there too. He was an essential element of the plan.

  Marcia tucked her hair behind her ear, noticing Tony hadn’t attempted to speak. He was waiting for her. “Okay. There is something. But it’s mostly for research.”

  “I’m listening,” he said, his voice even. “You know I’d do anything to make you happy, Marsh.”

  He would too. Tony was great. Funny, relaxed. Open-minded.

  But this…this was asking a lot. Tony was a traditionalist, deep down. He believed in home and hearth and had confessed his desire to have a family one day. Was this asking for too much? She hated hiding something this huge from him. Betraying him in her mind by not being honest was almost as bad as doing it in reality.

  Being with Cale would be fun. She cared about him a lot but Tony was the real deal, the man she wanted a future with. God, she wanted them—both—so badly.

  If she hadn’t come up with her book idea this morning, would she ever have had the nerve to voice her needs aloud? And if that were really the case, who the hell was she to advise other women?

  Bolstered by the thought, she took a deep breath. The answer to this question could make or break her book—and her relationship.

  “I want to go to Kink.”

  Chapter Two

  Tony shoved another box against the wall behind the ornate cherry desk that would serve as All About The Story’s checkout counter. Normally he took care when he was sorting through the various things Kelly Crossman, one of the owners of the bookstore, picked up on her flea market junkets. She’d been told to wait until they had the basic design of the store laid out before she started doing her girly design thing but she wouldn’t listen.

  Her enthusiasm was hard not to appreciate. The woman was clearly in love with her business.

  He could relate. At least to the love part—or serious like—just not with work.

  “Hey, hey.” Kelly toed the box he’d just rammed into the baseboard. “Try not to break my stuff.”

  “Sorry.” He mopped his brow with the bandanna he’d tucked in his waistband. Late May and Ely, Maryland, was already beginning to broil. “Guess my head’s not in the game today.”

  “That’s okay. You know we appreciate all your help.” She sat on the desk, swinging her long bare legs like a kid. She wore cutoff shorts and a snug tank top, completely oblivious to how naturally sexy she was. “So what’s the deal? You sick of working for Diana the bitch yet?”

  Tony dragged over a box of rare books Kelly had unearthed at an estate sale and sat down, a grin crossing his face in spite of himself. “You and Marsh sing the same damn tune. Diana’s not half bad.”

  “She try to get in your pants yet?”

  “Not wearing pants.” He glanced down at his shorts and then back up at her as she rolled her eyes. “No, Kel, she hasn’t. She hasn’t even looked at me sideways. Maybe I’m not her type.”

  “Just you wait.”

  “Are you sure she’s really that way? She strikes me as a nice woman, maybe a little lonely. She mostly keeps to herself. You women always rip each other new assholes.”

  “Trust me, I’m sure. You don’t believe your girlfriend either? She’s told you Diana’s poison.”

  “Maybe if she told me why, I’d be more inclined to agree.”

  She compressed her lips into a thin line. “Not my secret to tell.”

  “Yep.” He ran a hand over his buzz cut. Perspiration clung to the back of his neck despite the air-conditioning. Then again, that could’ve been due to nerves, something he had plenty of. “Same tune, different singer.”

  “I don’t break confidences. But I’d watch out for her. She likes younger men. I think she trolls for them.”

  He flung his head back and laughed. “I’ll make sure my belt’s tightly notched whenever she’s around.”

  “Seriously, Tony. She must know you prefer older women so I bet you’re in her sights already.” She tugged a candy out of her pocket and popped it into her mouth. The scent of cinnamon filled the air.

  “I don’t prefer older women. I prefer Marcia. It wouldn’t matter to me if she were twenty or fifty.”

  “That’s sweet.” She pitched her wrapper into the trash can in the center of the room.

  The place was still a mess, but slowly everything was taking shape. The floor-to-ceiling bookshelves he and Cale helped build filled every wall except for the one with the gorgeous blue granite fireplace, which luckily they hadn’t had to install. Marcia’s brother Adam and his friends had handled that aspect of the design, though now Tony and Cale had been commissioned to build free-floating shelves above it. Since those shelves would hold the pieces designed by local artists that Kelly and Spencer were planning on featuring, they’d have to start the shelves pretty high to make sure there was no heat damage. Cale had come up with some pretty good ideas, ideas he now wanted to replicate in his apartment. As soon as Tony was done here, he’d be heading over there to get some more work done.

  After that his evening would take a definite turn south.

  “Yeah, well, sweet’s my middle name.” Tony drew the toe of his sneaker through the trail of sawdust on the floor.

  “You know, I guessed that about you.” She leaned down to wave a hand in front of his face. “All right, spill it. What’s the problem?”

  As if he would discuss his sex life with Marcia’s brother’s girlfriend. “No problem.”

  “Sure.” She snorted and jumped off the desk, her ponytail and giant gold hoop earrings swinging. “Keep telling yourself that.”

  “Ever heard of Kink?” he blurted when she turned away.

  Her shoulders stiffened. Slowly she turned back and cocked her head. “Why?”

  Recognizing a defensive stance when he saw and heard one, he scratched his chin. If he didn’t
shave soon, Marsh would start complaining about stubble burn. “Just wondering. You obviously have.”

  “Yeah.” She came back to the desk but she didn’t climb up again. Instead she leaned against it and lowered her voice, though they were alone until Spencer and Adam returned from the hardware store. “Actually, I’m kind of a regular.”

  If Tony hadn’t been sitting, he would’ve needed to. “What? You? You look so—” He stopped, his gaze traveling from Kelly’s bouncy ponytail to her sneakers. Her cheeks glowed with health and she wore no makeup whatsoever. When he pictured her, she had a book in one hand and a clipboard in the other. She definitely wasn’t parading around nude in front of avid crowds of people.

  “Innocent?”

  “I would’ve picked wholesome, but yeah. Okay.” Tony rested his elbows on his knees. “For real?”

  “For real.”

  “But I thought you and Spencer—”

  “What?”

  “That you were exclusive.”

  “We are.” A smug smile tipped up her mouth. “As exclusive as it gets.”

  “But if you’re hitting up a sex club…oh.” Realization dawned painfully. “Wow. Guess I’m the last one on board this train.”

  She folded her arms across her chest. “There’s nothing wrong with not being into it. Not everyone is. It took some getting used to, I admit. I didn’t walk in the door and get naked first thing.”

  Tony loosely clasped his hands in front of him. He didn’t particularly relish having this conversation with Kelly but he’d rather be embarrassed and have some clue of what awaited him tonight than walk into Kink blind. “So people really get naked. All the way naked,” he added, not wanting any ambiguity.

  “Some do.” She tugged on the end of her ponytail as she studied him. “Some don’t. There’s a whole section of the club that caters to people with tamer inclinations. Meaning they just come there to dance and drink. Others like things a little wilder.”

  “Which are you?”

  She smiled slyly. “Let’s just say I have other places to dance. When I go to Kink, I want something else.”

  “And so does Spencer.” Again Tony tried to reconcile the man he knew—an awesome, fair-minded boss who tolerated no crap and seemed as if he’d been born in a suit and tie—as a regular patron of a sex club. Simply did not compute.

  “Listen, Tony, I don’t mind answering your questions. But I don’t like answering for someone who’s not here. You know?”

  “You can trust me. I won’t tell anyone. I promise.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “You forget what happened a year ago? How you cracked jokes about me and my PDA at a company staff meeting?”

  “That’s not what happened. Exactly.” He let out a breath, knowing it was closer to the truth than not. “A lot can change in a year, Kel. I’ve grown up.”

  At least he’d learned his lesson eventually. No matter what, he’d never again make someone the butt of a joke, even a so-called harmless one.

  “Yeah, a lot can change.” She cocked her head, studying him intently. “Now you’re store manager at the Nook and you and Marcia have gotten more serious.”

  “Maybe I’m more serious but I’m not really sure she is,” he said quietly.

  It wasn’t as hard admitting it aloud as he’d assumed it would be. For months, he’d noticed his feelings toward Marcia deepening, extending way beyond the fun and games their relationship had begun as a year and a half ago. She’d started sleeping over more often though neither of them talked about what that meant. Partly because he wasn’t sure what he wanted, other than more Marcia. He wasn’t a guy to put his feelings on the line until he knew what he planned to do about them.

  If he was in love, that meant a commitment. Not marriage necessarily. She wouldn’t go for another fancy ceremony. But he’d expect more than just doing the bump and grind followed by talking over coffee in the morning.

  In the meantime, he would reserve judgment until he ascertained exactly how he felt. Then he’d proceed with intention, either to get Marcia in his bed for good or to part as friends. Hell, tonight could end up being the tipping point for both of them.

  “What do you mean?” Kelly asked, bringing him back to the conversation. “Marcia’s not ready to be serious?”

  Maybe if he was brutally honest, Kelly would feel more relaxed being that way too. “I’m not sure. She’s gotten some wild hair about writing a sex advice book and I think I’m her test subject.” Until she found a better subject—or multiple better subjects—at Kink anyway.

  Kelly choked out a laugh. “Why am I not surprised?”

  “About not being sure she’s serious, the sex book or the test subject?”

  “All of the above. You look at her like she’s a goddess, so your feelings aren’t a shock. As for the sex book—” She laughed again. “So that’s where the Kink thing came from? Does she want to include voyeurism clubs in her book?”

  “I guess. We’re going tonight.” He hesitated and then shrugged. Might as well come clean. “I thought she was going to tell me she wanted a threesome with Cale.”

  “Why?”

  “They have this vibe between them.” He shrugged, remembering walking in on them sitting in front of Cale’s computer. The scene had been completely innocent but he hadn’t missed the look they’d exchanged. Nor had he overlooked the way his best friend had lifted his hand off Marcia’s leg as soon as Tony had appeared.

  He trusted them both. They wouldn’t make a move toward each other behind his back. He knew that. But how much longer could he pretend he didn’t see the serious sparks they shot off every time they were near each other? And what if—what fucking if—those sparks didn’t die down even after they went for a threesome? What then?

  “A vibe,” Kelly repeated, her eyes going wide. “You don’t think they’re sleeping together?”

  “No. Absolutely not. Neither of them would ever hurt me like that.” He shook his head. “Instead of the threesome, she sprung the club on me.”

  “You didn’t mind the ménage idea?”

  “Not really. I mean, I’ve shared everything else with Cale. I think I could do it with Marcia too. At least for one night. That’s all it would be.” It would, dammit. “Besides, people do it all the time, right?”

  “I must not hang out with the cool kids then. No one I know has ever had one. Or they haven’t admitted it.”

  “Cale’s done it before. Plenty of times. He’s bragged about it enough I figured I was the last one who hadn’t.”

  “I’ve had two.” She pried another candy out of her pocket. “Sort of two. They might not have technically counted.”

  “Okay,” he said, waiting for the punch line.

  “Neither guy penetrated,” she said matter-of-factly. “Well, the first time there was no penetration, period. The second time only Spencer did.”

  He couldn’t help grinning. “No wonder you and Spencer are always smiling. You’re clearly not lacking in certain areas.”

  “No, we’re well suited there. Which is why it works. One of the reasons anyway.” She grinned back. “And if you tell him I said anything, I’ll pull off your nuts one by one. Just saying.”

  “Same goes with Marcia. Except the nuts part.”

  She nodded. “Understood. So what are you going to do about Kink?”

  “Go, I guess.”

  “You’re okay with a threesome with Cale, right?”

  “Yeah.” Actually if he were honest about it, the idea turned him on. Imagining his best friend getting to see his sexy woman naked, watching her give him pleasure—and receive it—all the while knowing she’d be coming home with him? That was pretty damn hot. “I trust him with my life. I’d trust him with Marcia too.”

  “So bring him with you to Kink. Start the party there, if you get my drift. If she’s into it too,” she added. “Though I’m guessing she will be. She’ll probably be into it way faster than I was.”

  “It took some time for you?”


  “Sure. I’ve always been a slow learner. C’mon, I was voted most likely to be the last virgin at Middlemarch High. And they weren’t wrong.” She shrugged. “I was completely clueless the first time I saw a cock.”

  Grinning at Tony’s loud burst of laugher, she waved as the door opened. “Aw, look, my men are back,” she said, walking over to take the takeout bag out of Spencer’s hand.

  “I love when I walk in and the last word I hear is cock.” Spencer snatched the bag right back.

  “I was talking about Adam’s, not yours,” she said sweetly, brushing a quick kiss over his lips before she again grabbed for the bag. She dug out a French fry, dangling it over her mouth before she took a big bite. Spencer watched her the entire time.

  Adam grinned and high-fived Kelly. “Sickening, aren’t they?” he asked Tony, tossing him a glance.

  “Absolutely nauseating,” Tony agreed, rising. Looked as if his break was over.

  Which meant he was that much closer to tonight.

  * * * * *

  A prudent woman on a budget shouldn’t go out and spend a hundred dollars on a sexy dress. Marcia, however, had never claimed to be prudent.

  How could she resist? The deep red wrap dress cinched her waist and revealed plenty of cleavage. It also ended right above her knee. In the old days—before she’d gained those seventeen-point-five pounds—her hem length had been decidedly higher. Since then she’d learned the value of being demure. Or more demure, since no one would ever use that particular word to describe her.

  She grinned and poked through the bag of goodies she’d purchased. Maybe she could write the dress off on her taxes along with the cherry-chocolate lube and remote-operated vibrator. They were all part of her research. The lube was just a replacement tube but the remote-controlled vibrator was something she hadn’t tried. They’d have fun after the club, no doubt about it.

  Kink, on the other hand, was an unknown element.

  “You asked to do this,” she reminded herself, reaching up to take the last few curlers out of her hair. She teased her curls into a sexy tangle and tried to ignore the rare bout of nerves stampeding through her belly.

  She didn’t consider herself a control freak under normal circumstances. She wasn’t submissive or dominant in bed, taking turns with both. Sexual surprises were exciting. But Tony and Kink? They just didn’t go together.